The word BAILOUT has different meanings in different countries. In India BAILOUT is a political term. It indicates that a criminal who is also a politician has been successful in getting BAIL so that he can be kept OUT of jail to serve the people.
In America BAILOUT is a financial term. It indicates that people who are experts in losing money will be given more money so that they can continue to lose it. A BAILOUT is currently underway in the United States.
Supposedly this bailout will rescue the markets of the world. Now I know that this is a bunch of good old fashioned BULLSHIT because there is no chance in hell the Americans would ever readily give away 700 Billion Dollars.
It’s a scam people, a scam endorsed by George Bush to trick America and the World into giving America more money.
It started way back in February this year. In order to start another war somewhere in the world American politicians decided to create something called the ‘Subprime Credit Crisis’. It was supposed to be a fake crisis that would lead people to believe that there was actually a real economic crisis. American politicians and bankers started telling people that there was a shortage of money in the world.
They then used that excuse to kick people out of their homes. After this experiment worked they then took it to their stock market. Every trader and stock marketer started to believe that there was a crisis. They started to panic and began running around like a bunch of headless chickens with a loose motion problem.
Journalists and the Media Monkeys thought it was funny so they started to cover the running of the headless chickens and gave it a name ‘The Great Economic Crisis’. Now the Americans have managed to create the biggest hoax in modern history. They’ve sent the world economy into shock simply by telling people that there is actually a problem when there is none!
A smart investor like me would never fall for such a dirty trick. It’s another attempt by Forbes magazine and America to take away my money.
Now apparently George Bush and his staff are ready with an ‘emergency’ plan to pump in 700 Billion Dollars so that everything can be fine. Since this is a real solution to a fake crisis it needs to be acted out with precision.
Democratic and Republican Americans will sit behind closed doors pretending to come up with ways to provide 700 Billion Dollars. In reality they’ll just watch cartoons and drink beer. After two hours behind closed doors they’ll emerge and indicate that they have a solution in sight.
After keeping up this drama for a few days, the President will state that they have agreed to inject 700 Billion Dollars to save the economy.
American people will be forced to pay more taxes in order to make up all this money. The start of this problem saw them lose their houses. The solution to this problem will be to take away whatever little money they have left.
All the collected money will be stored in the Lehman Brothers building.
Thank God I’m not an American. In India we never conduct scams like this. We are honest.
Mera Bharat Mahaan.
12 COMMENT:
Sirjee, Tussi Great Ho! Is Khushwant Singh now on your payroll? No one this poor soul believes can write "With Malice Towards One and All" Better than him.
SirG,
This is not a Bailout but a BUYOUT package for Indian Stock Markets. It is valued around $1 Trillion Dollars. Everytime Bush pushed each of the BIG fIve to come and buy shares here your friends at the Stock Exchanges increased the share prices and the Layman had to buy at very high prices.
Look at the KDAG (Reliance) combined wealth reached the top Forbes list.(K factor works here too)
Now this was intolerable by Americans. They give us Dollars and you go and buy out Arcelor and Corus and Spielberg.
Yes we are honest very honest. Dollars for Dollars. Now when they Bail OUT $ 700 billion dollars the prices of your stocks will be raised so high that in 2009 you will jump from 1062 floors to may be 62 floor (below this only Forbes parking are allowed).May be ONGC becomes RONGC by then.
In India GEC (great economic crisis) is related only for TV channels. DISH, TATASKY, BIG and AIRTEL. Who's DD?
Vinod Agarwal - 100 mein se 99 Be Imaan, Phir Bhi Mera Bharat Mahan!!
Khushwant Singh is never Khush thus he's not on my payroll + he refused to act in 'SINGH IS KINGG'.
Vinod,
let me impart some knowledge;When the fake bailout succeeds the Indian traders will dump my shares to buy American ones using American money.
I will go from 1062 to 2062,that can't happen.That's why I never sell my own shares to our traders.I sell it to the Russians that way I go from 1062 to #1.
Rakesh- could possibly help Vinod to create apps for the Google Gphone.Rakesh knows the tricks of the Android OS.
Sir ji,
what a view if i would hve not read it I always had paid sympathy to the blo.. American politicians but all of them are bullshit. People like you are great inspiration for me sir...You are thereal institute of Knowledge
SirG,
How can I ever afford to refuse an offer from you and anything to learn from you.
My needs are limited to a million users who can afford Rs.100 per month for content created by me or UGC.($25 million Annual Gross)
Android v/s Iphone v/s Windows v/s Symbian?
Which ever can speak one of the 17 Indian languages is going to survive in my opinion.
Missed your show on CNBCTV18 and landed at NDTV PROFIT today in MIND of the Market only last few minutes.
Archiving such niche programmes and the likes of Indian Idol on 3G is a dream on which Onkia was created.(whenever that happens)
No DVD No Piracy and No CYBERCAFE.
Mera Mobile Battery Mahaan. Any OS which can work the longest battery will survive in a country which has no POWER (pun intended)
Vinod Agarwal - Beggars are not choosers and Idea's are nobody's monopoly. Learning the Indian Business rope trick.
ARE THESE BLOGS REALLY BY MR. RAKESH JHUNJHUNWALA ??
AND STILL IS THIS A JOKE ABT THE AMERICAN ECONOMY OR IS IT ALL TRUE RJ??
Very well written....Mera Bharat Mahan..Jai Hind
Vinod-Idea's are the monopoly of the Birla group "what an idea sirji".
Gunjan-Poonam should answer your question.You two are made for each other.You question Bharat's greatest investor while she hails me.
You did not complete you article this time. Could you pls tell us what is going to happen to all the money that is going to be locked in Lehman bro's building?
“Please accept my apology & RJ you hv a grt sense of humour ....yes poonam i dont mind giving it a try wt RJ has said?"..
Thank you.....Sir, i would like to ask you one question..I have my money invested in few companies like RPL, Kirloskar ferro etc..not huge investment...but can i invest more in the same companies..so that cost goes down...or else should i wait some more time?
And ya I would like you to answer Gunjan question....
Poonam,
You are the only investor who wants to invest so that their value goes down!
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