Friday, September 26, 2008

The Economy Is Screwed,Give Me 700 Billion Dollars,No Seriously!

The word BAILOUT has different meanings in different countries. In India BAILOUT is a political term. It indicates that a criminal who is also a politician has been successful in getting BAIL so that he can be kept OUT of jail to serve the people.

In America BAILOUT is a financial term. It indicates that people who are experts in losing money will be given more money so that they can continue to lose it. A BAILOUT is currently underway in the United States.

Supposedly this bailout will rescue the markets of the world. Now I know that this is a bunch of good old fashioned BULLSHIT because there is no chance in hell the Americans would ever readily give away 700 Billion Dollars.

It’s a scam people, a scam endorsed by George Bush to trick America and the World into giving America more money.

It started way back in February this year. In order to start another war somewhere in the world American politicians decided to create something called the ‘Subprime Credit Crisis’. It was supposed to be a fake crisis that would lead people to believe that there was actually a real economic crisis. American politicians and bankers started telling people that there was a shortage of money in the world.

They then used that excuse to kick people out of their homes. After this experiment worked they then took it to their stock market. Every trader and stock marketer started to believe that there was a crisis. They started to panic and began running around like a bunch of headless chickens with a loose motion problem.

Journalists and the Media Monkeys thought it was funny so they started to cover the running of the headless chickens and gave it a name ‘The Great Economic Crisis’. Now the Americans have managed to create the biggest hoax in modern history. They’ve sent the world economy into shock simply by telling people that there is actually a problem when there is none!

A smart investor like me would never fall for such a dirty trick. It’s another attempt by Forbes magazine and America to take away my money.

Now apparently George Bush and his staff are ready with an ‘emergency’ plan to pump in 700 Billion Dollars so that everything can be fine. Since this is a real solution to a fake crisis it needs to be acted out with precision.

Democratic and Republican Americans will sit behind closed doors pretending to come up with ways to provide 700 Billion Dollars. In reality they’ll just watch cartoons and drink beer. After two hours behind closed doors they’ll emerge and indicate that they have a solution in sight.

After keeping up this drama for a few days, the President will state that they have agreed to inject 700 Billion Dollars to save the economy.

American people will be forced to pay more taxes in order to make up all this money. The start of this problem saw them lose their houses. The solution to this problem will be to take away whatever little money they have left.

All the collected money will be stored in the Lehman Brothers building.

Thank God I’m not an American. In India we never conduct scams like this. We are honest.

Mera Bharat Mahaan.

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