Trying to understand this has been very hard. The entire world is happy that Barack Obama is the next President of the United States. The media monkeys are jumping for joy.
I fail to understand what the gallata is all about but I can sense the media’s excitement. The Americans make a big deal of absolutely everything. Clearly they don’t know what a real election is.Only 1 out of two people could have won the presidency of the US. It could only have been John McCain or Barack Obama. So the media asking questions like ‘Who Will Be the Next President’ is total bullshit.
If the Americans want to make a big deal about an election, they should do it here in India because in our country anyone can be Prime Minister;Sonia Gandhi,Manmohan Singh,LK Advani,Rajnath Singh, Narendra Modi, Prakash Carrot,Mayawati,Chiranjeevi,Syed Shahbuddin, Lalu Yadav, Pappu Yadav,DP Yadav,Venkaiah Naidu, The Guy From The Surya Bulbs And Tubes Ad,Udit Narayan,Sania Mirza,My Milkman,……Anyone.
The difference is that our Prime Ministers don’t need to work as hard as Obama to become the boss of the country. We believe in simple solutions. Another example of the India Story.
Barack Obama worked way too hard to become the President. He should have learnt the Indian way to be the leader of a democracy from the experts like Deve Gowda.
For the past 2 years Obama ran around all across America. He went from state to state and gave speech after speech for 12 hours a day. He said ‘We Need Change’. The American Beggars Society threw coins at him. That’s how he got his campaign money:
Deve Gowda on the other hand went to a party meeting just for the free snacks and before the meeting was over became the eleventh Prime Minister of India:
Barack Obama shook people’s hands, greeted them and said nice things:
Deve Gowda was sleeping:
Barack Obama was on TV every night debating important issues trying to convince people to make him the next US President:
Deve Gowda was sleeping:
Barack Obama made fancy speeches and used big words like democracy, freedom, Bin Laden, etc:
Deve Gowda was sleeping:
Barack Obama is a moron because he exhausts his body by standing for hours giving speeches:
Deve Gowda always sits down and gives speeches:
Barack Obama gave away a free T-Shirt every time somebody gave him $30:
Deve Gowda dressed like this:
Barack Obama will spend the next four years framing economic policy, managing the Iraqi war and dealing with Russia:
When he was PM, Deve Gowda massaged his lower lip and tried to guess the number of stars in the sky:
Obama will spend hours and weeks trying to rectify the problems of his country. His team will find every possible solution to solve a problem and if that fails Obama will accept responsibility for the failures of his administration.
Deve Gowda never worried about these things.Whenever something went wrong in the country,He simply pointed to the opposition and said “It’s Their Fault”.
Barack Obama promises to kill Osama Bin Laden:
Asked what he would do if he found Osama; Gowda dug his nose and said “We Will Hand Over the Case to the CBI.”
Obama may be the next President of the US but he knows nothing about leadership like Deve Gowda. Deve Gowda is a man of action.
Posts
30 POST a COMMENT:
Ha, Ha, ha... too good. But don't you think that we need a change... ??? Not a change like Obama, but a change which can only provide a smile on each and every Indian's face. If someone is able to provide a smile that will change everything.
I like your style...
Cheers!!!
Manoor
You have already established through this blog new standards in the art of back-handed complementing. However, this is one post that indeed is a complement to "O"...
...Why, one wonders, you like "O"..?
Manoor,
For smiles,India can use Happy dent white chewing gum.
Anonymous,
"O" is a letter,I don't like letters.
I think its high time, India need to get rid of these 'over-old-still-hungry-for-power' politicians. People, who are not sure of whether they would tomorrow or not, talk about India's vision.
I wish some blast would kill them all...
I am also a firm believer that we need another revolution..the one like 1857..to get rid of dishonest, nonsense and a**hole politicians..
Best of the lot !!! Deve Gowda brings out the best out of you? Whos better? Gowda or Karunanidhi?
Very well composed. And so true. Deve Gowda was an iconic leader ;-)
Hahahahahaaaaaa...... Rakesh ji...did you ever think why our leaders sleep......?? It would be good to know in your way of telling these tales of great Indian leaders....and by the way even our AP chief minister YS Raja Shekar Reddy is no less to Deve Gowda ( at least in sleeping) ........
The d’s theory on the new economics
Economics is a study arts which, an economist, has to use every time with the tools of economic science, which that economist himself think and make, for the betterment of the economies around the world. Though every situation is different from the other, so no two same solutions can be used to solve an economic problem. What might have worked earlier may not work the next time as things change…..like what worked in the great depression may not work in solving the problem of the 2008. But the basic of economics will be same all over the world, that is, for the government’s economics is to increase is its spending with a control increase in the budgetary deficits and for business economist it is to increase the profit with a control in the business spending.
The problem of 2007-08………
The problem of 2007-08 is the out come of the policies adopted by the Fed in the 2000 to burst the dot com bubble…. The dot com bubble busted but that led to the creation the biggest economic problem the world had ever seen. When in 1999 and 2000 Fed wanted to burst the dot com bubble it started increasing interest rates, which not only effected these dot com companies but other industry too which needed money for expansion. These companies planned for expansion or project when the interest rates were low, but higher interest rate delayed or scraped these projects. After the bubble busted the Fed started lowering interest rates as the over all economy had also been effected. It started lowering interest rate and made money easily available for the people and the returns on money in the banks or fixed income started to fall, banks and other companies started lending the money they had, which is now called the sub prime market. The decision taken in 1999-2000 their effects immerged in 2007-2008. What has to now understand is that the steps taken today, its effect will show up in a couple of years latter, though it will have an immediate effect on the stock market.
The solution to the present crisis……
There are a number of solutions that have to be taken by the economists and the governments around the world to fight through this crisis and come out the recession that have engulfed the whole world. The few of the D’s suggestion are as follows:
• Change in the computation of the inflation data. Many changes have to be done in the computation of inflation as what the basic necessities where there when inflation items were selected may not be of that great importance today and many more things have to be included in the calculation of inflation now.
• The sector or the industry which is and can be responsible for a bubble should not be allowed to grow at a higher rate… like when the dot com was looking like a bubble and the fed wanted to burst it, they should together with the government should have made laws tough for those dot com companies to raise capital and money from the equity market, banks, etc; would have been a better option.
• Some of the banks in every country should be government owned, this will provide a sense of confidence to the public there in the bad time. By nationalizing the banks I don’t mean that the government should have a total control, but just have a holding in some banks to a tune of 10%-15% whatever the central bank and the government of a country decide. The banks should be under the supervision of the central bank coz this will help the banks not to give bad loans and they are accountable to some higher authorities.
• Going towards a zero interest rate policy, I feel is a biggest drawback a central bank can do, as after lowering interest rate too much the central bank and the govt. will have cut their hands. There should always be some interest rate prevailing in an economy, I guess a minimum should be about 1% or 1.5%, as people except money to grow with time. Zero interest will show that the money in this economy will not grow and secondly people, mainly the senior citizens and people living on interest from their money, will be effected a lot as they will be left with no income at all.
• Every economy (countries) in the world should be open and at the same time should be closed too. By this I mean, the every country that has a global trade should to some extent have a closed economy where only the local companies can do the work. For eg. India produces steel, so the Indian companies should be allowed to sell a part of their output to the international market while making it a point that a fix percentage, say 20%-25%, will be sold in the local market. This will help the companies to isolate themselves from a global or a local slowdown and also give them opportunities to have a boom of the other markets.
• The free commodity trading should be a thing of the past. People and companies who deal in the particular commodities should be allowed to trade in these commodities freely. If everyone is allowed to trade freely in commodities it will be like legalizing hoarding and black-marketing. For eg. The crude prices went up from $70- $80 to $147 in such a small span of time was only on account of free trading in oil contracts. Now if financial companies will start buying oil contract, then the price of the oil is bound to go up, when these companies don’t have anything to do with it. But on the other hand let say if a refinery company or an oil marketing company is buying oil contracts its quite understandable that these guys a doing business while the others are doing hoarding to make profit. If at end of a contract the buyer had to take delivery of the oil, these companies can do it very easily while the others, like banks, financial institutions, individuals, will go panicky as to where to keep the oil. Other than gold, silver and other investment commodities all other commodities should be restricted in trading by people who don’t deal in them. Individuals and banks n financial institutions should only be allowed to trade in these commodities to some extent.
• Today what USA requires the most is a tax cut in the hands of the common man so that he can give his loan installments and pay for other daily expenses easily. No matter how much a government spent, till the time an ordinary man start spending and buying goods no economy can survive. The confidence of people have to be revive to kick start an economy and for that governments should spend on project which will employ more people and will create jobs.
Bad times and good times are a part of life. Every bad time will end with a start of a good time and every good time will lead to a phase of bad time. Its just the way the governments and the authorities and more important the individuals who make their ways out of the bad time…. into a period of good time again. The pain is forgotten soon but a new lesson is left every time.
The d’s theory on the new economics
Economics is a study arts which, an economist, has to use every time with the tools of economic science, which that economist himself think and make, for the betterment of the economies around the world. Though every situation is different from the other, so no two same solutions can be used to solve an economic problem. What might have worked earlier may not work the next time as things change…..like what worked in the great depression may not work in solving the problem of the 2008. But the basic of economics will be same all over the world, that is, for the government’s economics is to increase is its spending with a control increase in the budgetary deficits and for business economist it is to increase the profit with a control in the business spending.
The problem of 2007-08………
The problem of 2007-08 is the out come of the policies adopted by the Fed in the 2000 to burst the dot com bubble…. The dot com bubble busted but that led to the creation the biggest economic problem the world had ever seen. When in 1999 and 2000 Fed wanted to burst the dot com bubble it started increasing interest rates, which not only effected these dot com companies but other industry too which needed money for expansion. These companies planned for expansion or project when the interest rates were low, but higher interest rate delayed or scraped these projects. After the bubble busted the Fed started lowering interest rates as the over all economy had also been effected. It started lowering interest rate and made money easily available for the people and the returns on money in the banks or fixed income started to fall, banks and other companies started lending the money they had, which is now called the sub prime market. The decision taken in 1999-2000 their effects immerged in 2007-2008. What has to now understand is that the steps taken today, its effect will show up in a couple of years latter, though it will have an immediate effect on the stock market.
The solution to the present crisis……
There are a number of solutions that have to be taken by the economists and the governments around the world to fight through this crisis and come out the recession that have engulfed the whole world. The few of the D’s suggestion are as follows:
• Change in the computation of the inflation data. Many changes have to be done in the computation of inflation as what the basic necessities where there when inflation items were selected may not be of that great importance today and many more things have to be included in the calculation of inflation now.
• The sector or the industry which is and can be responsible for a bubble should not be allowed to grow at a higher rate… like when the dot com was looking like a bubble and the fed wanted to burst it, they should together with the government should have made laws tough for those dot com companies to raise capital and money from the equity market, banks, etc; would have been a better option.
• Some of the banks in every country should be government owned, this will provide a sense of confidence to the public there in the bad time. By nationalizing the banks I don’t mean that the government should have a total control, but just have a holding in some banks to a tune of 10%-15% whatever the central bank and the government of a country decide. The banks should be under the supervision of the central bank coz this will help the banks not to give bad loans and they are accountable to some higher authorities.
• Going towards a zero interest rate policy, I feel is a biggest drawback a central bank can do, as after lowering interest rate too much the central bank and the govt. will have cut their hands. There should always be some interest rate prevailing in an economy, I guess a minimum should be about 1% or 1.5%, as people except money to grow with time. Zero interest will show that the money in this economy will not grow and secondly people, mainly the senior citizens and people living on interest from their money, will be effected a lot as they will be left with no income at all.
• Every economy (countries) in the world should be open and at the same time should be closed too. By this I mean, the every country that has a global trade should to some extent have a closed economy where only the local companies can do the work. For eg. India produces steel, so the Indian companies should be allowed to sell a part of their output to the international market while making it a point that a fix percentage, say 20%-25%, will be sold in the local market. This will help the companies to isolate themselves from a global or a local slowdown and also give them opportunities to have a boom of the other markets.
• The free commodity trading should be a thing of the past. People and companies who deal in the particular commodities should be allowed to trade in these commodities freely. If everyone is allowed to trade freely in commodities it will be like legalizing hoarding and black-marketing. For eg. The crude prices went up from $70- $80 to $147 in such a small span of time was only on account of free trading in oil contracts. Now if financial companies will start buying oil contract, then the price of the oil is bound to go up, when these companies don’t have anything to do with it. But on the other hand let say if a refinery company or an oil marketing company is buying oil contracts its quite understandable that these guys a doing business while the others are doing hoarding to make profit. If at end of a contract the buyer had to take delivery of the oil, these companies can do it very easily while the others, like banks, financial institutions, individuals, will go panicky as to where to keep the oil. Other than gold, silver and other investment commodities all other commodities should be restricted in trading by people who don’t deal in them. Individuals and banks n financial institutions should only be allowed to trade in these commodities to some extent.
• Today what USA requires the most is a tax cut in the hands of the common man so that he can give his loan installments and pay for other daily expenses easily. No matter how much a government spent, till the time an ordinary man start spending and buying goods no economy can survive. The confidence of people have to be revive to kick start an economy and for that governments should spend on project which will employ more people and will create jobs.
Bad times and good times are a part of life. Every bad time will end with a start of a good time and every good time will lead to a phase of bad time. Its just the way the governments and the authorities and more important the individuals who make their ways out of the bad time…. into a period of good time again. The pain is forgotten soon but a new lesson is left every time.
SirG,
Upload anything from mobile on http://onkia.mobi/addfiles.asp and share with your friends on http://onkia.mobi/Onkiavideo.asp on any cell phone.
Vinod Agarwal - Bending Backwards and adds new feature to ONKIA
Anonymous,
Old? They are still jawan.
Amit,
Neither,it is the guy who sleeps in the last row during the budget speech.
Trailblazer,
I don't think Deve Gowda has a Ford Icon.How can you say he's iconic?
Satish,
Leaders sleep to keep themselves healthy.If they fall sick who will lead?
Rd Sethi,
Your theory deserves a Nobel prize nomination and you deserve a job in the Finance ministry to write our 5 year plans.
Onkia,
Since you are my friend I will not charge you for advertising on my blog.I will also tell my Broker friends to use your site to upload stuff.
Rakesh-Writes a blog that provides low cost advertising solutions.
Precursor to Ad-sense
SirG,
I am obliged and honoured wiith your very generous attitude.
Vinod Agarwal - Counting Obligations endlessly...
Nice article.. Really hilarious..
Harish,
If you used Hair-tel you'd be called Hair-ish.
Pujya Trading Bhagwan,
why r gujju traders fat? Look at SP Tulsian, Shankar Sharma ... they are not fat. BTW who is going to die of heart attack first , you or Ashwini Gujral ?
Anonymous,
Tulsian and Shankar get enough exercise worrying when the Market will fall so they never gain weight and Ashwani has not got up from his chair in 15 years.The lack of exercise will kill him first.
oh my god, that is the funniest damn thing I've seen in ages...way to go.
Manish,
You just insulted my writing.You said it was funny but I'm only stating the facts.Then you damn it and lastly you called it a 'thing' instead of a work of art.
O..my god! You have written it so well...goddamn..I laughed and laughed..and am still laughing! :)
Good Job Rakeshji! Will be waiting to read more of work....
Boy! You took a dig at him. A big and hilarious one.
man! the post is awesome.. You can get Obama's pics by clicking the go button in images.google.com but how did you manage so many sleepy images of our iconic leader ?
Anonymous,
Which anonymous are you? the old anonymous who damned my writing or a new anonymous?
Rahul,
Are you saying I'm a digger?
Niklaus,
He was the PM baba,I got them from the government library:)
i totally love this blog. btw-how do you think our most esteemed sri sri deve gowda and sons will fare in the by elections scheduled for dec 27, 2008? any chance of them picking up a seat or two or will they get totally blanked out?
Anonymous,
They should get by in the election.
what goes get by in the elections mean? how many seats will they pick up? or will they not be able to get even a single seat?
DG gowda is the farting idiotic useless asshole always digging is nose and ass and sleeping
Simply Super :)
Cheers!!
Jason
I bLog at "The Most Authoritative Technology Blog"
Anonymous #1,
That answer should be best answered by Dorab Sopariwala.Did you sing Only HOLE.
Anonymous #2,
You love Deve Gowda!
Jason,
Why cheers?I do not drink and since you told me where you blog,let me tell you where I blog,It's right here!! Freaky Huh!
Sorry for commenting on an old post, but it will always hold good. There are many points of comparison and surely the blog will overflow if you list everything. Here's one:
In all the pics of DG, he looks so thin... all of that was pre-PM post. After that, he hardly fits in a chair. OTOH, Obama is sweating it out more after being elected and is thinning down! How foolish of him!
Post a Comment