On Rape

When the 1st rape happened, I was shocked

When the 2^nd rape happened, I was shocked again

When the 3^rd rape happened,I was angry

When the 4^th rape happened,I was livid,

When the 5^th rape happened,I was outraged

When the 6^th rape happened,I was manic

When the 7^th rape happened,I was enraged

When the 8^th rape happened,I was distraught

When the 9^th rape happened,I was sad

When the 10^th rape happened,I was helpless

When the 11^th rape happened,I was tired

When the 12^th rape happened,I was annoyed

When the 13^th rape happened,I was frustrated

I stopped counting after that.

Now its happened so many times that I am simply dead just like her :

The Ballad Of BS Yeddyurappa - A Poem

Yeddy saw the Iron Ore Ore

He stole it, became a Chor Chor

Sold it, the $$ started to Pour Pour

He made many a Crore Crore

He wanted More More

Became an Iron Whore Whore

The Governor started to Bore Bore

Yeddy attacked with a Gore Gore

There was Blood Blood

Of Allegations there was a Flood Flood

On Yeddy there was thrown Mud Mud

Plans to remove him were a Dud Dud

He sang I am Dabangg,Hud Hud

I am the Stud Stud

Everything is Fine Fine

The Iron is Mine Mine

There was a No Confidence Motion

For that money was the Lotion

The MLA’s were Bought Bought

No one could be Caught Caught

The Congress tried to Scream Scream

To make Yeddy resign was their Dream Dream

They wanted him to fall on his face Flat Flat

They didn’t remember that their Chavan gulped the Adarsh Flat Flat

 Chavan and Yeddy

To resign none was Ready

Yeddy depended on the Brothers Reddy

To keep his Chief Ministership very very Steady

Then came along Justice Hegde

That’s what began Yeddy’s bad Day Day

He screamed “ Help,Mayday,Mayday”

Not being CM anymore meant Canceling Payday

 

Iron was exported in ships from the Port Port

That’s what was written in the Lokayukta Report Report

Yeddy didn’t dare go to Court Court

In Bangalore he wanted to hold Fort Fort

The Media started to Spout Spout

In front of Gadkari, Yeddy decided to show his Clout Clout

He repeated the same Line Line

“I will not Resign Resign”

Finally the time Came Came

For Yeddy things wouldn’t be the Same Same

There was a lot of Drama Drama

Yeddy went to the Temple and shouted “Rama,Rama”

Neither Rama nor Krishna heard his Cry Cry

All Yeddy could do was Try Try

Yeddy’s Bheja was getting Fry Fry

His options were getting Dry Dry

Yeddy started to Yell Yell

Losing the chair was Hell Hell

But the time had Come Come

Yeddy in despair needed the Rum Rum

There was no Choice Choice

No one heard his Voice Voice

All his rants were just Noise Noise

As he waved the ‘V’ Sign Sign

All he could do was Resign Resign

Later Yeddy came and met Me

He asked me Sadly Sadly

Why he was forced to resign so Badly Badly?

“You fool” I Said Said

“Get this into your Head Head”

It was not Kumaraswamy who made you Resign

It was not the Reddy Brothers who made you Resign

It was not the Congress who made you Resign

It was not the Governor who made you Resign

It was not the BJP high command that made you Resign

Heck,it wasn’t even JUSTICE HEDGE who made you Resign

The only one who made YOU resign was YOU!!

You shouldn’t have stolen the Ore

Instead You kept saying “Yeh Dil Maange More”

MORE ORE MORE ORE

NOW CHIEF MINISTER NO MORE

You want to blame someone for losing Your Chair?

Look no further than the one in the mirror You Stare.

 

Progression : A Poem

The UPA's second rule

Was supposed to be cool.

But the common man is simply a tool,

Someone to be thought of as a fool.

Today they sit in Delhi celebrating 2 years of their second reign,

Trying to be unaware of everyone’s pain.

In the time they've been there,

Take a look at what we've had to bear:

Ashok Chavan steals flats,

He lies and hides the facts.

He was supposed to be the Chief Minister,

Instead he ended up an Adarsh trickster;

We can now call him a THIEF MINISTER.

Those flats belong to the Army,

If I were a Soldier he'd grab my home and harm me.

This fellow's task was to organize the Commonwealth Games,

Instead he played his own Wealth Games.

He's hidden the money well and gone to prison.

Stealing the country's money is nothing short of treason.

His name is Suresh Kalmadi,

Making him organize the CWG was a monumental tragedy.

Lalit Bhanot is his deputy,

His definition of the "standard" is a beauty.

Paisa kha kha ke Lalit Mota ho Gaya.

Lo ji! Desh ka Maal phir se chori ho Gaya .

Then there is Andimuthu Raja,

2G Spectrum ka Maharaja.

How many in Tamil Nadu starve without any money?

While his Dr.Kalaignar gorges on the finest honey?

Today the DMK is angry that their Kani is in jail,

Because Ram Jethmalani couldn't get her bail.

They don't care that she stole India’s money,

Forget Kanimozhi, we can all call her Kani-money.

The United Progressive Alliance.

I see unity and I see an alliance.

But the only Progression,

Is a hardcore Combination,

Of soul sucking Inflation ,

And as always of good old Corruption.

It took this man to stop eating

To remind them to stop cheating!

Kapil Sibal is breast beating,

He'll do anything to ensure the Lokpal's defeating.

CD's are made by Amar Singh,

Phone calls are gotten by Digvijay Singh ,

Now you know why Singh is King.

This isn't just a rant against the UPA,

I haven't forgotten the NDA.

I still remember the Coffin Scam,

+ The IC814 Clusterf^ck,

+ Gujarat

It’s impossible to forget 26/ 11,

The only thing he does is "condemn" 24/7

The Americans went into Pakistan,

Swooping in like Shaktimaan,

They smashed Osama,

Because that bold decision was made by Obama.

We on the other hand can't even hang a Kasab

Or an Afzal Guru.

Kyunki darr hain inko

Na jaane kya ho jaaye shuru?!!!

Saalon tum sab darte raho,

Aur darr hatane ke liye Mountain Dew peete raho.

Darr Mein Hi Chalo,

Aur Chunlu Bhar Paani Mein Doob Maro.

Ravi Shastri - An Ode To The Feeling

Clearly I have failed to understand Ravi Shastri’s passion for ‘GETTING THE FEELING’ but thanks to the following Ode by Shastri himself I now realize how deep his passion for “Feeling” and “Getting” it truly is. The World Cup is beyond blessed to have such a great commentator who gets the Feeling the way only he does:

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A Feeling - What Is It?

That which I feel is the Feeling

Can you feel what I feel? Do you even know what I feel?

No you cannot for that which I feel is the Feeling that no one else feels

Where would the Feeling be without my Feeling of it?

It would merely be something unfelt,

Completely unfelt until I feel it. 

It is only after I feel it that it becomes felt leading to the Feeling I feel...

I have always felt the Feeling no one else has ever felt and no one will ever feel the Feeling or feel about the Feeling the way I feel the Feeling for I am the Supreme feeler of the Feeling.

Feeling is not easy, it takes years of Feeling to feel the Feeling the way I feel  it and it is my Feeling of the Feeling alone which can be considered to be the real Feeling. 

Every other Feeling felt and unfelt by anyone else capable of Feeling is not a true Feeling because the feelers of the Feeling are incapable of getting the Feeling that I have felt…

I alone can feel…

I alone GET the Feeling...

If it weren’t for me the tracer bullet would never have been felt and in turn you would never have felt my Feeling of the tracer bullet,

If it weren’t for me things would never have gone down to the wire. It is only because of my getting of the Feeling that the downing of the wiring constantly occurs for only I can comprehend the Feeling  in the way it is meant to be felt and that Feeling  presents itself when things go down to the wire.

No one can put a Ceiling on my Feeling

Or even try Sealing my Feeling

Just because you don’t get the Feeling

Don’t try to steal my Feeling.

Who is P.Ling?

Is he a Chinese guy who can sing?

Whoever be P.Ling,

Fact is even he cannot get the Feeling.

Go to Google, Go to Bing,

Even over there only I get the Feeling.

Whether it’s Batting or Bowling,

Only I get the Feeling.

Even when Munaf Patel is fielding,

Only I get the Feeling.

Be It Eating

Or Sleeping

Or Walking

Or Talking

Or Acting

Or Jumping

Or Singing

Or Dancing

Or Cooking

Or Riding

Or Laughing

Or Hiking

Or Jogging

Or Shopping

Or Even Hitchhiking

         …….I just Get the Feeling

Feeling the Feeling no one else feels,

Getting the Feeling no one else gets,

At the end of the day,

Cricket is not about Winning or Losing,

It Simply Is About Getting The Feeling,

AND I ALONE JUST GET THE FEELING.

The Naxalite :A Poem

The Naxalite

Is always up for a fight.

Why is it that despite all our might,

We cower in fright?

The approach is to always sit tight.

The whole of 2008 we dealt with terrorists.

The whole of 2009 we seem to be dealing with the Maoists.

This time they hijacked a train

,

Tomorrow it will be a plane.

How many more have to die in vain?

How much longer will India have to deal with this pain?

This one is a writer:

Should one even listen to her?

Just because she has a Man Booker?

Let her throw a hissy fit,

Tell her to stay in her poisonous pit.

Everyone knows she’s full of shit.

What is wrong with her types?

Can’t they see what’s right and what’s wrong?

Has some false sense of righteousness filled their crack pipes?

Something they use to keep getting high with their bong?

The government’s prime approach is to “condemn”

Or better still “strongly condemn”

They prefer it be handled by the Police,

But those guys are equipped the least.

You saw what happened during 26/11.

The terrorist used the AK-47,

While the policeman used the rifle,

The terrorist wasn’t even troubled a trifle.

How can you expect such a one,

To fight the Naxal who cares for none?

Oh sure you’ll give him money for the machine gun,

From twenty years that money is only going towards the MP’s fun.

Even under the eyes of Madam Ji,

Raja is making crores of the spectrum fee.

Of course it’s wrong to use the army,

Even if the Naxal continues to harm me.

For you it’s about support,

Didi has helped to make your UPA fort,

To get rid of the communist,

She sided with the Maoist,

And drove away the industrialist.

Now her hand is being bitten,

By the redheads led by Kishen.

All the killing ,

And blood spilling,

Has not had an effect,

Are you a eunuch with a defect?

Have your balls fallen off?

How much longer will you tolerate the Naxals scoff?

If you were Mahinda Rajapakse;

You wouldn’t listen to one damn thing the Maoist had to say.

For the sake of his country,

He and his army destroyed the LTTE.

You on the other hand,

Act like a boy band.

Singing and dancing to the Naxal’s tune,

They make you look like a hapless cartoon.

Francis Induwar died headless,

His wife became husband-less,

His children fatherless,

All you could do was to say that the violence was “senseless”

What bloody Nonsense!!

When ever there is a pest infestation,

It’s time to call in the extermination.

Only you want to indulge these cockroaches,

And they will continue to burn train coaches.

Send the Maoist philosophy back to China,

With a heavy dose of severe heart angina.

If the Naxals want to play war games,

Then send them up in flames.

These cockroaches want to commit homicide,

Blast them with a heavy dose of insecticide.