(+)I have had a spat of calls lately to inquire about the market. While I loath the media, I do appreciate the calls from tipsters. Especially the ones that send me secret information about my enemies.
(9) Some of my associates tell me that it is not a good idea to put my phone number on my web page. (1) They say that a bunch of fools will inundate me with calls looking for stock tips. (2) Well they would be right. (2) I'd rather that people who want stock tips read my past advice, or failing that, do their own damn research. Or as a last resort, try and find a reputable analyst that they trust to provide some common sense information about the stock market. (5) But I want to make it possible for some people to reach me directly; tipsters, for example, or CEO's wishing to have me invest in their pathetic companies at a ridiculously low price, or my informants at SEBI that let me know before the raids begin. (6) Since I work in my office and never at home, (5) I am putting my office phone number here on my web page.
(9) Sometimes I get calls late at night by bloody British investors who seem unaware that I do not live in their time zone. I work in India, which is four and a half hours later than UK, so knock it off you wankers. AND start respecting us, it's been 60 years since we threw you out. (0) Anyway, you better damn be aware of time zones when you call, and wait until at least 10am India time. (1) My time is valuable in fact more valuable then yours so you better speak to me quickly while ignoring punctuation. I want to hear what you have to say in 10 seconds or you're wasting my time. (0) Is that clear Mr. Happionaire? So any speed talkers with tips about my enemies who happen not be a Happionaire please reread this entry and you will find interspersed with the text all twelve digits of my phone number listed one digit at a time in parentheses, starting with the country code. (0)
Forgot to mention, for those of you that send me naked pictures of any politicians wives, or SEBI, BSE, RBI or otherwise, I'll throw in my email address too.