Friday, November 20, 2009

Adnan Sami & Jermaine Jackson :"Let's Go To Mumbai City"

I was at the Indian Institute of Foreign Trade this week where I gave a presentation to IIFT students. I did get irritated when the IIFT professors started asking me more questions than the students themselves on stocks to invest in. Rakesh Bhai doesn’t take kindly to being interrupted.

So I messed with them and told them to invest in companies which have all gone bankrupt and are no longer listed on the Bombay Stock Exchange. By the time they find out, it’ll be too late and will teach them to never interrupt Rakesh Jhunjhunwala ever again. Bloody hell **** Broker Samajke Rakha Hai Kya?

Anyway, this IIFT session was held to bring more foreign investments into India and increase foreigner activity in India.

In my opinion (which is the right opinion by the way) foreigner activity in India is already quite high. Consider the case of David Headley. A victim of reverse outsourcing where an Asian company aka the Lashkar E Toiba outsources terror activities and employs American and Canadian professionals.

When will our politicians protest this intolerable job loss? Asian companies outsourcing to the west = unthinkable.

By the way have you read this latest article about foreigners in India? Featured in the pinnacle of JournalismThe Jhunjhunwala Times. It’s about Adnan Sami and Jermaine Jackson’s latest song ‘Let’s Go To Mumbai City’.

Gabbar Singh|Jhunjhunwala News Network

Mumbai: Popular pop music exponent and former obese individual Adnan Sami was in Mumbai today shooting for the uncensored version of his latest musical offering ‘Let’s Go to Mumbai City’. Joining him was also Jermaine Jackson who is incidentally the elder brother of the late King of Pop Michael Jackson.

Mrs.Malini Bhatnagar the Vice President of Sales for T-Series Cassettes & CD’s which is producing the video sounded upbeat about the video “We think Adnan with his vocal ability and Jermaine with his uh…uh… ability make a deadly combination. The song is very melodious and something India’s youth can easily tap their feet to. It also emphasizes the united spirit of Mumbai city. We are very confident about its chances and expect sales of at least 10 million copies in Maharashtra alone”

But critics have pointed out that Adnan Sami’s presence might not go down well with the Indian audience. Adnan, a Pakistani citizen initially has been trying unsuccessfully to attain Indian citizenship. His application was rejected eighteen times in a row by the Indian government, a new national record.

Faced with desperation Adnan had also agreed to convert to Hinduism to gain Indian citizenship. For one week last year Adnan had in fact became a Hindu Sadhu and changed his name to Adnan Swami in an attempt to become Indian. Though in South India Adnan was known for the same period as Adnan Swaminathan Iyengar.


The Muslim Law Board of India immediately declared a Fatwa on Adnan but Adnan being a humongously obese and FAT individual at that time, the Law Board changed the Fatwa into a FAT-WA for wanting to change his religion.

Scared Adnan had demanded police protection but was given only two constables as bodyguards. Fearing for his life Adnan reverted back to being a Muslim and consented not to convert to any other religion at which time the Muslim Law Board nullified the FAT-WA.

Today Adnan is back after having lost more than 100 kilos and is thrilled to collaborate with Jermaine Jackson on ‘Let’s Go To Mumbai City’

He quipped “Jermaine has always been a childhood idol of mine. I used to bunk school just to listen to his songs and have all his CD’s at home. It’s a dream come true for me”


On being asked about the political connotations of the song Adnan remarked “It’s just a song. We’re not trying to make any political statement. It’s a tribute to the fighting spirit of Mumbai. So all the controversy regarding the song is needless.”

He was of course referring to statements made by BJP General Secretary Arun Jaitley “Mr. Sami has lost his mental sense of balance. We here in India do not need a Pakistani born rejected Indian Citizenship Candidate turned Canadian Citizen and an American individual to sing inappropriately about India. This is a blatant case of the Congress Party trying to undermine India's sovereignty.Chief Minister Ashok Chavan must immediately resign, his government should be dismissed immediately and President’s rule must be imposed without further delay.”

He was not alone, Ram Madhav of the right wing RSS quoted vehemently “Mr.Adnan Sami’s video is against the Hindu Religion. There are shots where he is shown offering worship at mosques. Why is he not worshipping in Temples? We will not take this lightly and will organize a nationwide Bandh on the 22nd of November to protest his song and video”. He ended with this message “Don’t Worry We Will also build Ram Temple in Ayodhya, Jai Shri Ram’

Raj Thackeray’s party the MNS too has spoken out against the video. A party spokesperson had said that “We don’t want outsiders coming to Mumbai and Maharashtra so the title of the song should be renamed to LET’S GET OUT OF MUMBAI CITY. The MNS has also taken credit for the fact that their party forced T-Series to change the title of the song from ‘Let’s Go To Bombay City’ to ‘Let’s Go To Mumbai City’.

Not to be left behind Shiv Sena member Sanjay Raut issued a comment to media persons waiting outside his house “These foreigners come to India and film our children doing the Number two and make pictures like Slumdog Millionaire and win the Oscar Award. This foreign fellow called GERMANY JACKSON should go back to Germany. Yahaan Sab German Music Nahin Chalta.Yeh Aamchi Mumbai Hain.” It was only after a reporter corrected Mr.Raut that the artist in question was named Jermaine Jackson and not Germany Jackson that he slowly retreated into his house.

Others too have reacted to this song which is a rage all over the internet.

Shashi Tharoor tweets “It’s an acceptance of India becoming a major tourist hub with eminent singers wanting to come here“

Eminent historian Ramachandra Guha says “This might sound strange but in fact I actually agree with the MNS on this issue. The producers should change the title of the song because from what I hear the video is being shot in Mumbai city and the song was also recorded in a Mumbai studio so there is no question of going to Mumbai city. In fact both the artists and the crew are already in Mumbai city so how can one go to Mumbai city if he’s already in Mumbai city? It’s not possible unless they’re talking about another Mumbai City but both you and I know that there is only one Mumbai City.”

Anuj Shastri a student of Mithibai College says “I know Adnan Sami and I know Michael Jackson but I have never even heard of Jermaine Jackson. Who is this fellow?”

Teenager Priya Deshpande chimes in “Wasn’t Jermaine the man in the Big Brother house with Shilpa Shetty? I didn’t know he was a singer also. Wait let me SMS this info to my friends” so saying Priya immediately starts to type frantically on her mobile phone.

Senior Constable Harish Tawade who was on duty the night one sequence was shot near the Gateway of India highlighted the security aspect of having foreigners in India “Yeh log bahut shor macchata hain. Hum Log Gateway of India par duty pein tha aur mein Gateway ke andar khana kha kar so gaya tha.”

“Ek dum achanak loud speaker pe hum ko kuch sunaai diya,hum sab samjha ki terrorist attack tha.Mein utkar shirt dalkar gaya to dekha ki yeh Mota sala Adnan aur ek phoren African babu naach gaana kar rahaan tha.Baad mein pata chalan ki ye Michael Jackson ka bhai tha,”


“Bolna chahiye naa ki gaane ka video banata hai.Director ko bulakar hum do diya uska kaan ke neeche, woh salaa rone lagaa.”

Local Tapori Pintu Paapdi who was having tea at Salim’s Tea Stall remarked quite confused “Yeh sala ladki ki tarah gaata hain .Kya bolta hain apun bheje mein uttarta hi nahin.Bhai ke khilaf kuch bolega toh Mote ko wohin ka wohin thok dega aapun”

But the last word clearly belongs to Kanti Bai, a local ayah. When we asked her about Jermaine she remarked “Dekho sheher mein germs aayenga toh haath dhone kaa aur ek phenyl bottle maarne ka.Do balti paani pekhne ka,yeh germ worm sab dekh ke bhagenga”.

So are you too going to Mumbai City?

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