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Sunday, October 21, 2012

Robert Vadra's 'I Want Horse!'



This following conversation occurred this past week :

Digvijay Singh: Hello All! We are gathered here today to discuss important things. Let us begin!
Robert Vadra: I WANT HORSE!

Digvijay: Err…Ladies and Gentleman we must do something about this Arvind Kejriwal.He is exposing all of us one by one.
Gadkari: I KNOW ! Look what he did. He exposed me!This is what happens when people google ‘Kejriwal Exposes Gadkari’

  
Khurshid: Dude that is disgusting!
Gadkari: YOU SHUT UP YOU SECULAR DIPSHIT! My bank account is well irrigated you asshole! I don’t need to go after the blind people like you!
Khurshid: SUCK MY BALLS YOU COMMUNAL DOG! I WILL SPILL YOUR BLOOD!
Vadra: I WANT HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A.Raja: Arre yaar! Why you people doing the tension? Look at me.2G Scam made me 1, 53,000 crores.I only spent 2 years in jail. Now I am out on bail partying in DMK Constituencies like Madurai!
Sharad Pawar: WE MUST UNITE! WE MUST Unite against Kejriwal before he exposes us all. Let us expose him instead. He has become a problem. We must do something!
Kalmadi: But what can we do? As it is they are not allowing me to continue my good work by recontesting Indian Olympic Association elections! All my CWG work will go down the drain now.
VADRA: I WANT HORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
DIGVIJAY: What we must do is Unite against Kejriwal.Kejriwal is an insect in our plans. He is a bloody fly. Flying around and infecting the minds of the people. He spreads lies and calls it the truth. This shitty fly and his maggots have started an India Against Corruption.
They are even making a film on this dangerous Makkhi.



Pawar: I agree. As the most expert corruptician I think we must unite against India against Corruption.Kejriwal is from India against corruption and we are against India against Corruption. Therefore from now on we are Indians Against India Against Corruption. It is decided.

GADKARI:AGREED!
VADRA: I WANT HORSE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Digvijay: YOU STUPID BASTARD! FROM THAT TIME YOU ARE SCREAMING YOU WANT A HORSE.WHY THE FU#K DO YOU WANT A HORSE YOU 0% BASTARD?!!
VADRA: BECAUSE I WANT TO DO THIS! 

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Will Someday Please Explain What This Stupid Song Is Supposed To Mean?

 
Ever since I met Fake Jhunjhunwala (who I plan to have executed) 4 months ago, I have consistently dedicated my efforts to realizing the meaning of the world’s greatest conundrum. My superior intelligence has been confounded by just one thing and one thing only in the last few months. It has occupied me day and night. Night and day. Afternoon also.

This is the reason I have been absent .I have been marooned on an island of my own thoughts trying to decipher this puzzle. Every possible crack team of intelligence personnel ,RAW,CIA,FBI ,CBI and ACP Pradyuman’s CID have been pressed into solving this fundamental question :

 WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DOES ISHQ WALA LOVE MEAN?

SOMEBODY TELL ME! 

I Have seen this song on TV from the film ‘Student of the Year’ and it has frazzled my mind ever since.

I know that ISHQ means LOVE [ʻIshq (Arabic: عشق‎; in Persian: eshgh; in Urdu: ishq; in Dari: eshq; in Pashto: eshq; in Turkish: aşk and in Azerbaijani: eşq), means love]

I also know that LOVE means LOVE

I know that Wala is a suffix as in  JHUNJHUNWALA.

 

So ISHQ WALA LOVE should mean LOVE WALA LOVE.


EH?!

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN?WHAT IS A LOVE WALA LOVE?

SOMEBODY TELL ME!


I am asking the director of this film Mr.Karan Johar what the bloody hell is ISHQ aka Love being used for in a song title already having the word  LOVE? 

I even saw a young person writing the name of this song as ISHQ WALA LUV.I have immediately directed all my marketing companies to attract the youth market by changing the spelling of LOVE to LUV.

But I still fail to understand what Ishq meaning love means in Ishq wala love or love wala love.Just thinking about this gives my sexy head a headache!Grrrrr

Does this mean that from now on we shall see songs like :

MONKEY WALA BANDAR

KUTTA WALA DOG

AURAT WALA WOMAN

BHOOT WALA GHOST

JHUNJHUN WALA JHUNJHUNWALA


SOMEBODY TELL ME WHY THE FIRST WORD AND THE LAST WORD MEANING THE SAME THING IN TWO DIFFERENT LANGUAGES ARE BEING USED TO MAKE NO BLOODY SENSE!

If this is a film about students then I am very very shocked. I am worried about our education system.I plan to write a letter to our HRD Minister The Hon-Her-able KAPIL SIBAL and seek a proper explanation though I am sure Sibal will tell me that Ishq and Love both have zero loss.

 

ONE OTHER Question.In a song about LOVE in a film about Students WHY ARE THE PEOPLE  DANCING IN FRONT OF A BURNING TREE?

SOMEBODY TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You people relax and please watch a movie which has songs which have meaningful titles. This is a film not called Angrez wala English and it is produced by an awesome- super- duper- mega- super- fantastic –mega- guy. It’s called ENGLISH VINGLISH.


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